Yes, it’s been very real today. You know it’s real every day, at least it is for me, but some days it’s really real, if you know what I’m saying 🙂
It was a dreary day here, but I didn’t mind. And when Dale volunteered to take the children to school this morning, I was grateful. A bit of alone time. Yes, sir 🙂 But I did know there would be guys in my kitchen fixing my backsplash. That’s fine. We have other rooms in the house to drink coffee in 🙂
Jenna and I did a grocery run, which went ok. Besides the bill, but I’m rarely ok with that 🙂
The afternoon went downhill. Not in a horrible, tragic way. More like a slow, continuous battle. Today was vision therapy day for my son. We drove through rain, but got there in time. So that was nice. Also, a confession after my rant about running red lights. I think I hit about 10 yellow lights today 🙂 I went through some easily. Stopped for others. And I kind of went through one that turned red on me. Shame on me! I felt immediate guilt, because of all that I said about this. I really think God tests me when I say things 🙂
Anyway, that all went well, and then came home, threw some hotdogs and kraut in the crock pot because I’m nutritious like that. And I wasn’t going to cook with the tile guys in my kitchen. Don’t judge 🙂
Then milking time. Maybe I should correct myself, and say that’s where the struggle started 🙂 The weather turned muggy and humid, and our barn was a sticky mess. It affected me. And the cows. And the children. And the husband. You get my drift. Really though, the cows seemed uptight, hitting me in the face with their tail, kicking off milkers, chewing on them. And then the boys decided to race their bikes around, yelling loudly, till mom lost it, and hollered. Shame on me again.
Time for supper. Realized the hotdogs were on low 😦 Turned up the crock pot. One child is losing it that he made a mistake on his homework, call the teacher NOw, Mom, call her NOW. The other child ran around throwing folded wash on the floor. Another trying to tell me something, and yelling that she can’t talk because ev.ery.one interrupts her. One comes in stripped down to his skivvies, fussing that his brother threw sawdust on him, and he’s so itchy, and his sister is lecturing him on immodesty. Aand the mom yelled,”What next???!!” And started dishing out advice, and thank goodness the hubby is coming in the door!
And then more homework, and bathtime, and bedtime. I told them I couldn’t wait to put them to bed. That probably wasn’t the nicest thing to say. I really felt like that though. I wonder if I’m cut out for this job of mothering sometimes. My post last week about life, and how quickly it can be gone, should make me think. And it does. But then why do I mess up over and over again? I can picture God sighing about me some days.
Like I said, not a terribly, horrible no good very bad day. Just a day that felt like I didn’t cope well with my attitude and my children.
I feel a bit silly now that I wrote out my feelings 🙂 But I also feel better. And in about 5 minutes, I’ll be feeling better yet. Because I will be eating an apple dumpling from my sweet mother. And it will be very yummy 🙂 Don’t judge 🙂
Feel free to share your struggles in the comments. I admit to sometimes feeling like I bore you over my life, and have little interaction with you 🙂 My stats show that someone is reading this blog. Maybe not many, but still some 🙂 And I love reading comments, so please share if you find time 🙂
Now… about that apple dumpling;)