Grace

Written Monday evening. Writing is a sort of therapy for me 🙂

I’ve messed up again today. Just a few days ago, when I wrote this post, I was feeling encouraged, energetic, and I meant every word I said. So why is it that I forget so easily? Why do I let my situation get the best of me? I tell the children all the time when they complain that so and so is annoying them, that the only way they can annoy you is if you choose to let them. Easy to say 🙂 I know what some of my triggers are. Too little sleep, too much going, hormones. Some of those can be helped, others you just have to make the best of it 🙂 Today was just one of “those” days, you know? It began with me not getting enough sleep. I never am bothered by caffeine, so I drank a cup of Mt. Dew. Well this was Sunday, and I also don’t sleep 2 hrs. in the afternoon during the week, which is exactly what I did that afternoon. And it was glorious, by the way 🙂 So apparently the nap and the soda worked against me, and I couldn’t fall asleep. So a short night it was. And Mondays are Tristan’s therapy days, so I knew I wouldn’t get a chance to have a little nap. Another tip I’ve learned is that a 10/15 min. nap when you are really tired, can really make you feel lots better 🙂 So being tired, having a husband with an ankle sprain, and children that seemed to fight all. day .long, I caved to the pressure building inside, and my poor children received the brunt of my stress. And I was so ashamed! Why do I do that/ Why do I talk in a nasty tone to them? Why can’t I control my temper? I’m a grown woman, a mother, a wife, but above all, a child of God. And I failed miserably. My head hung in shame, as I thought of all the words that came out of my mouth in a cross, unkind way. In fact, my tender hearted 7 yr. old was in tears because I hurt his feelings. I knew that I couldn’t let them go to bed without apologizing. And they were so forgiving of their tired, grumpy mama. And I prayed, ” God, please forgive me.” And He does. His ever abundant grace and love are there. I wonder if He ever gets weary of this woman 🙂 Sometimes it’s embarrassing to speak of our faults, but I am by no means perfect, and neither are any of you 🙂 Some people I respect and admire seem pretty perfect, but we all know no one is. And my goal is to be an encouragement to my readers, not to come across as having all the answers. I hope if you’ve had a bad day, you will feel God’s love for you, and have a taste of His grace. Grace that is greater than all our sin. And if you have some tips on child training, or learning to control your tongue and your temper, please give them to me! Lord knows I need all the help I can get 😉

8 thoughts on “Grace

  1. Gina Bergey says:

    I am with you! I am too often like that too – when am I ever going to learn??!! 🙂 It’s good to know it’s not just me, and there are others with the same struggles! Keep praying, that goes a long way! 🙂 Thanks for all your interesting posts! I enjoy reading! 🙂

  2. Oh, my. I had the same thing happen the other night. I was SO tired, and so much was weighing me down. My frustrations mounted to the point that I felt I would explode. It all spilled over in the form of speaking WAY too harshly to our sweet boy. OH, I felt such remorse after it was all over. Even after I had begged and pleaded with him to forgive me, I had a terribly hard time forgiving myself. He did not deserve that, and I just felt so bad. He is so tender-hearted, too, and he is also extremely forgiving. I suppose our children need to see that part of us…that we are human…one time the Lord showed me that they need to learn what it means to forgive others. Zachary should have lots of experience in that department…from my failures alone! God help us all…we are all human, and if any of us pretend not to be and feel that we are holier than others, we are only deceiving ourselves. No matter how put-together someone appears to be, we are all hopelessly human and desperately flawed. We have all sinned and come short of the glory of God. Thank GOD for His amazing grace! And for precious, forgiving children. 🙂 I hope you are feeling better by now, sweet friend. You are an amazing mother and such a shining example for Jesus….even this is part of that. Don’t ever forget how special you are. 🙂

  3. That could have been my day, any day. If you want to keep being an encouragement to your readers, keep writing the truth. Show that you are human and have faults and rainy days. It’s the story of every mother. Then, talk about forgiveness and being forgiven, because that is a much bigger story for eternity. 🙂
    One thing is for sure, parenting is hard. We all break under the pressure sometimes.

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